Monday, June 20, 2011

Jarred baby food makes bad parents

So, a post on facebook this morning called me out as being a bad parent.  Because I fed my child jarred baby food instead of making my own.  I guess I bought into the whole consumer trap, you know?  So, you can just put me in line with however other millions of parents feed their baby pre-processed foods for the worst parent of the year award. 

The post started out innocently enough with "Now that I've had myself a handful of babies I just don't see the point in jarred baby food."  See, that isn't so bad.  It's just saying that she prefers to feed her child her own homemade baby food.  No biggie there, right?  Right.  Then it starts to get ugly.  23 comments of ugly to uglier.  I really hate this "better than you" parenting method that people employ anymore.  Especially natural home birthers.  They feel so pretentious and self righteous just because they skipped on modern medicine and an epidural.  And God forbid you ever gave your child formula.  God forbid.  You may as well just give your baby up for adoption now, because if not s/he will end up as a serial killer rapist baby killer one day.  Because you gave them formula. FORMULA!

I do understand why it's better to make your own baby food but honestly, I work a full time job.  Then I come home to a full time job.  I am often really busy and you know, sometimes it was just easier to pull out a jar of baby food and feed him.  And it was def easier for day care to do.  I'm sure I'm a horrible parent because I have my child in pampers instead of cloth diapers (which I did consider heavily), too.  And because he will be two next week and still isn't potty trained. 

Oh, and my stepmom told me that the news said that boys who drank soy formula (if you didn't know, Asher was lactose intolerant and when my milk started to dry at the end of the game I supplemented with formula, about half and half or so) would grow up to be gay.  So I fucked up there, too.  Who knew it was so easy to fuck up your child in so many ways in just two years while all the time you thought you were doing pretty OK?  It was horrible, she just told me and looked at me in the eyes with a sad, knowing look, like, 'oh, you poor thing destined to have a horrible GAY son.  I knew you shouldn't have given him soy formula, even if real formula mixed with your breastmilk made him poop blood.'  Something like that. 

By the way, I told her that if he was gay that I would love him twice as much as I already love him, which would be hard since I really love him as much as I can already, but I would do it extra hard if he were gay. 

Moral of the story, some of us just aren't cut out to be champion breeders.  Oh well.  Asher seems happy enough.  I think that's good.


  1. Number 1: There will always be someone spouting some nonsensical info somewhere about some everyday topic. The majority of the time it turns out to be bullshit.

    Number 2: Drinking fucking soymilk will not cause your child to turn gay! What the fuck?

    Number 3: Was Rosie actually worried about Asher being gay? If so (sorry Ryan), but she is just plain gullible.

  2. It was my stepmom. I am thankful that Rosie is smarter than that. So, my dad's wife, not Ry's mom. And yes, she really does think it's true, she heard it on the news!